I obviously wasn’t extrinsically motivated to write this blog as a way to share my insights about cultivating self-love through sacred nourishment .

The last post was almost 2 years ago.

 When I renewed this account a moment ago, I closed my eyes and sensed a feeling inside to guide me. The thought of cancelling it was neutral, and the thought of renewing it as a project like it had been before felt heavy. Then a third option came to me. I imagined opening up this on line journal as a place for me to write and collect images just for me and I lit up inside. With no business agenda, no pressure to perform, and no chatter from my inner critic, I have chosen to renew my relationship to blogging. I am making a commitment to creative, expressive self. There are no rules, no deadlines and no need for censoring. I have nothing to prove. This is a template for me. I know I want to write. My journals are many and full. If I use this avenue as well, great. If I find that I still prefer to write at night in bed with barely readable font, also great.

I enter into the Kiva of the season. Gestation just for the warmth of the womb. The mineral Earth charging my being. I draw within only for the sake of savoring the sacredness of inner temples, to process life and death and the dynamic dance in between. I commit to being in Gestation forever. Letting go of the egoic need to transform, recreate, and/or the decent to the darkness so that the precious “I” can better radiate my light, I have just liberated myself from expectation!

Maybe my life is my Gestation? No where to go, nothing to do, I have dropped my worries.