The Luscious Way

cultivating self-love through sacred nourishment


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Luscious Lemon-Poppy Seed Cake

My friend celebrated her birthday last week and asked me to bring a GAPS diet friendly dessert.

This is my spin on Lemon Poppy Seed Cake:

3 cups almond flour

1/3 cup whey protein powder (optional)

1 1/2 tsp baking powder

1 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp xantham gum

1/2 tsp salt

3 TBSP Poppy Seeds

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, softened (plus 3 TBSP for glaze)

1/2 cup honey or maple syrup (plus 1/4 cup honey for glaze) 

3 large eggs, room temp

zest of 2 lemons

1 tsp lemon extract

1 tsp almond extract

1/4 cup lemon juice (plus 1/4 cup lemon juice for glaze)

1/4 cup milk (I use unsweetened Almond)

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Preheat oven to 325-350 degrees

Mix dry ingredients in a separate bowl.

In a stand up mixer (using the mixing attachment) combine eggs, honey and butter, mix for 2 min.

Add remaining wet ingredients and mix until incorporated

Leaving the mixer on med-low, incorporate the dry into the wet, turn off and scrape down sides with a spatula, folding in any dry spots

Pour into a well buttered baking pan and gently smooth out (I use an 18″ spring form pan with great success)

Bake on middle rack for 35-45 min, checking with a toothpick at 35 min. The top will be golden brown and the sides will pull away.

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Cool for at least 30 min if you can handle waiting!

When ready to serve,  gently melt the remaining butter, lemon juice and honey together and stir with a whisk for the glaze.

Cut into wedges, rest them on their sides and pour the glaze over right before serving.

Also, you can add fresh berries and/or fresh lemon zest/peel for added flair.

I think we ate the finished cake before a photo op so you will have to imagine!

Enjoy!


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The Luscious Way (redefined)

My subscription was up again and I renewed it, even though the only post I made was exactly one year ago when I renewed last year.

I didn’t get down on myself for investing in something that turned out to be an unused creative template last year and I am even less “invested” this year, but I still renewed for some reason.

What I am becoming aware of is that leaving a sense of possibility open is worth the investment. This feeling of graciousness towards my self is just another example of what I call The Luscious Way.

I used to think that The Luscious Way was the name of my nutritional counseling business or the name of my successful blog presence (with cute and clever merch to boot!) that would turn into an empire like Martha Stewart created. All along I knew that the name was inviting me to choose a way of being, not just a way of living. Doubt has crept in during the times when I’ve felt physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually dry, like I was an imposter sharing my secrets of being luscious when I felt so barren. A hustler selling snake oil.

Now, in this moment I just smile at the journey and welcome my huge dreams and unattainable visions. I just can’t do it all. I don’t want to do it all. I am still a pioneer, a radical visionary.  I think up the greatest plans and ideas and have come to enjoy watching others go out there and manifest them. As a member of this super visionary collective consciousness, I am rockin’ it!  All “my” ideas are showing up out there and are more beautiful than my wildest imaginations. On a personal level I seem to never run out of creative inspirations, but I do run out of confidence when I buy into the story that I am not enough because I haven’t personally manifested all these inspirations.

People who know me may disagree. They can see that I have manifested all my creative dreams and when I look at what is so, my heart agrees. So the longing to write a cookbook or paint a series of awe inspiring visionary paintings or run a real foods cooking retreat in Italy and ultimately create and run a super successful creative nourishment center on a beautiful piece of land where I can spend my days designing ritual flower mandalas to infuse more beauty into the hearts of those who show up…well, the more I notice what is so in my life, the more I realize that I can choose to feel the satisfaction of moments in my life just as I would expect to feel having created all those big, wonderful dreams!

I AM LIVING THE LUSCIOUS WAY! All my dreams are true and manifest right here and now! So what, I didn’t write a successful blog and host life changing retreats around the world last year! So what, I didn’t successfully log all my photos and recipes into a cookbook that would probably just gather dust on someone’s shelf! I felt inspired when I made a good meal to feed my friends, family or self. I felt creatively nourished when I chanted and sang while painting a lovely goddess who lives on the wall of my bedroom. I feel a deep sense of retreat and nurturing when I connect with my moms group and take long walks with my friends. My family is thriving and all the little challenges keep me in self awareness and gratitude. My home, community and day to day relationships are a clear manifestation of The Luscious Way.  I have so much to offer and what I know is the most luscious way I can nurture my self is to let my creativity unfold organically, in good time, every moment an opportunity to be grateful for what already is.

Now I just want to be valued monetarily. So, how do I create an income from this place of being?ceremony-tent-july4th-036

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


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Gestation

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I obviously wasn’t extrinsically motivated to write this blog as a way to share my insights about cultivating self-love through sacred nourishment .

The last post was almost 2 years ago.

 When I renewed this account a moment ago, I closed my eyes and sensed a feeling inside to guide me. The thought of cancelling it was neutral, and the thought of renewing it as a project like it had been before felt heavy. Then a third option came to me. I imagined opening up this on line journal as a place for me to write and collect images just for me and I lit up inside. With no business agenda, no pressure to perform, and no chatter from my inner critic, I have chosen to renew my relationship to blogging. I am making a commitment to creative, expressive self. There are no rules, no deadlines and no need for censoring. I have nothing to prove. This is a template for me. I know I want to write. My journals are many and full. If I use this avenue as well, great. If I find that I still prefer to write at night in bed with barely readable font, also great.

I enter into the Kiva of the season. Gestation just for the warmth of the womb. The mineral Earth charging my being. I draw within only for the sake of savoring the sacredness of inner temples, to process life and death and the dynamic dance in between. I commit to being in Gestation forever. Letting go of the egoic need to transform, recreate, and/or the decent to the darkness so that the precious “I” can better radiate my light, I have just liberated myself from expectation!

Maybe my life is my Gestation? No where to go, nothing to do, I have dropped my worries.

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Easy Now

Spring is coming, but not yet here. The manic weather of March in Colorado shows up as 65 degrees and sunny one day and 30 degrees and snowy the next.

This is the time of year we animals like to lighten up our internal and external habitats with a nice deep cleaning.

It is NOT the time of year for extreme lifestyle changes, but rather easy transitional changes made by gradually decreasing the building foods (acid forming) and internally focused habits of fall/winter and increasing the cleansing (alkaline forming) and externally focused activity of Spring into Summer.

In my awareness to take this process gently and lovingly, I find myself approaching “spring cleansing” more gradually and simply every year.

This year I am starting to clean out my closets (and organs) by just noticing what I am storing. Do I really need my portfolio of drawings from design school circa 1997? Do I really need to eat meat, eggs, nuts and dense fats every day to keep my blood sugar stable and adrenals nourished?

One way I am measuring my stores of mineral reserves is by testing my urine and saliva pH levels.
After 2 weeks of consistent testing, I notice that my pH is measuring on the acidic side at an average of about 6.8 for saliva and 6.6 for urine.

An easy  way to increase alkalinity in the body is to eat alkaline forming foods (you guessed it, green vegetables!) and take a break from acid forming foods (meat, dairy and processed foods).

Here are 2 of my favorite meals of the week which not only provide the body with tons of easy to assimilate alkaline minerals(which assist in buffering the bodies’ natural release of stored acids) to begin the easy transition into spring cleaning, but also satisfy the need for warm/rich foods on these cold days of March.

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Shitake Almond butter Nori wrap and warm curry beef bone broth (Inspired by my new Health Coach, Summer Bock, she’s amazing, check her out at SummerBock.com)

We always make nori wraps in our house for dinner because the kids love them, but this time I left out the rice (which I often do) and used a spread of almond butter to seal the seaweed (awesome trick I learned from Summer Bock) which makes these wraps so satisfying and stick to your ribs!

To make them super tasty and easy to digest I topped the shitake mushrooms, cilantro, daikon radish, asparagus, carrot, and almond butter with a spoon full of our local preserved foods brand Mm Local’s Kim Chi. POW! Delicious.

Serving this wrap with a nice giant mug of broth is balancing and nourishing. The last batch of broth I made by roasting center cut beef marrow bones in the oven at 425 for 15-20 min and slow cooked them in my Crock Pot with filtered water, bay leaves, mild curry powder, fresh ginger, scallion ends, apple cider vinegar as well as some other veggie scraps I threw in during the 36 hours it brewed. I always spike my bone broth with a tablespoon of fresh lemon or lime juice just before serving to lift it up.

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Today’s lunch was equally satisfying, I call it Sweet Green Dreams
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Steamed sweet potato slices with sautéed leeks and greens with sweet miso sauce

I used a blend of baby “power” greens I had on hand from the store, no farm greens yet ;( and made a super simple sauce using equal parts sweet white miso to almond butter and whipped in some grated fresh ginger root and fresh grapefruit juice (from a grapefruit my seasonal neighbor brought me from her tree in Tucson, thanks Brenda!)

march 2014 039I topped this dreamy creation off with Ozuke’ brand fermented beets, dulse, and kale as well as a sprinkle of dulse. I wish I was still hungry, I want more!

 


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awesome carrot ginger soup

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carrot ginger soup made with 36+ hour chicken bone broth, pastured butter, and Thai ginger salt, topped with raw pumpkin seeds and Ozuke’ caraway and dill kraut

caramelize chopped onion in butter for 20-30 min until golden, adding chopped ginger toward end
add peeled and sliced carrots, lots of rich chicken bone broth and cook till soft (10 min after boil)
puree in vitamix or high powered blender with a couple pats of raw butter, a pinch of Thai ginger salt or sea salt, and an inch of fresh ginger till smooth

serve warm with a topping of seeds and fresh, live kraut


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3 step kraut

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#1 procure a nice head of organic cabbage

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#2 chop or shred in food processor

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#3 pack into a glass jar with 1 TBSP celtic sea salt and tamp down with a wooden spoon until cabbage “sweats” making a brine that covers the vegetable, weight down with another jar or heavy plastic zip top bag filled with salt water to displace the air in the jar, leave on the counter covered with a dish cloth for 3-4 weeks or until zingy and ripe with life!

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eat, repeat, enjoy


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an epiphany

I just realized that all this time I have valued teaching others how to love and care for themselves through healing their relationship to food and learning how to feed themselves sustainably that it can look like them choosing to eat out all the time and/or wanting nothing to do with food prep and that is OK!

As I dive deeper into the “how” I am finding less judgement about what this looks like for each individual. When someone calls me to feed them, they want to be fed. When I get excited about teaching the “people how to fish” instead of “giving them a fish” I notice that I get caught in the longing for an expected result; that they will know how and want to feed themselves and that this is the measurable indicator of them successfully loving and caring for themselves.

NOT SO SIMPLE AND SUPERFICIAL!

That expected result is one possibility and another is that they love and care for themselves and have a balanced and self-nourishing relationship to food, which looks like them wanting to be fed! Simple. Clear. Their main value and focus of energy goes elsewhere.

The old paradigm of us needing to be independent and act from a place of lack is shifting. The new paradigm is that of interconnection and inter “being” and inherent abundance.

So it does not hurt when I serve others by teaching them how to nourish themselves with intuitive and self-sustaining eating habits, but I realize that is not the goal in and of itself. The main goal is that we all begin to live with self love and radically intentional self-nourishment and the desired outcome is not to be “self” sustaining, but rather life sustaining and since we are all connected, we all play a different role in serving one another.

Maybe the people just need to be fed and one of my gifts is to feed them so they can focus on serving up their gifts to the world.

I have known this, but am realizing it on a new level. As much as I enjoy counseling and teaching others about the joys of mindful eating and seasonal cooking, I am curious to reignite my joy of feeding others as well.

Maybe I will start a soup kitchen.

Are you being served?

We don’t all have to do everything. In what way can you nourish yourself by gratefully receiving others gifts?blogpics 045


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dancing in the dark

When I get housebound in the winter with illness or “cabin fever” I have a dual experience of the restorative value of retreat from the busyness of daily life and simultaneously a fearful wavering sense of purpose and direction. This arises as a deep awareness of buying into the cultural myth of the importance of external accomplishment as my main purpose in life. The story that I will be worthy of love if I do enough (or become enough) to earn it is persistent!

This pattern of getting quiet and then yearning for distraction from the inevitable simplicity of being is very familiar to me this time of year and I do have a habit of trying to reinvent myself during the winter solstice and new year. The difference this year is that I am more aware of this habitual pattern of trying to distract myself from the dark unknown with grand plans of self-transformation and find myself in a place of loving vulnerability to witness the beauty of my attempts to care for myself through this outdated ritual. The reason this pattern doesn’t serve me anymore is that the very nature of this habit comes from a sense of lack. If I am in constant reinvention of Self, then I am only perpetuating the belief that I am not good enough and that I need to create something outside of myself to validate my existence, to become someone other than I am. 

The funny thing is that the main difference this year is that I notice how much judgement I have towards this process I go through every year, critically labeling it as another “existential crisis” which must be eradicated so that I will be forever free of the discomfort of the confusing unknown.  I know in my heart of hearts that out of this mystery comes the seeds of new spring growth and summer fruit, but I still feel a palpable, visceral, and culturally fueled yearning to have a plan to finally resolve my inherited story of separateness and scarcity. Then and only then can I  be free to live my life from a place of innate generosity of service and creation as opposed to fear and lack.

This duality arises when I feel out of control and purposeless, like I do during the dreamtime of winter. Even though I know it is not action I need to take right now, and not even to plan or resolve to act, I find myself tossing and turning in the dreamtime desperately trying to grasp on to a formula for the future. We just don’t like to be in the unknown. We trick ourselves with new years resolutions of self improvement which serves as inspiration for a while, but we all know these changes never last because they come from a place of scarcity. What I really want to practice is self love and self care from a place of acceptance and connectedness. Still, I don’t like being without a plan for self-improvement. I have spent so much of my life trying to transform myself that the thought of accepting my being the way I am is scary, as if self acceptance means that I will never manifest my creative visions! 

  I just don’t know what to do with myself when it is not a time of doing or reinventing or when I am too sick to dance and walk in nature (although there is always plenty to DO on a daily basis).  My main practice in 2013 was to relax into BEING, and I know that practicing stillness doesn’t mean I just sit around all day and don’t participate in the creative flow of life, but now I have come up against a deeper level of doubt which challenges my experience of practicing living as a Human Being as opposed to a Human Doing. I realize that I still sometimes buy into to the doubt that if I maintain a Zen quality of being my creative pursuits will have no (external) motivation. 

In the quiet of the deep winter’s pulse I gestate and hear clearly that it is not the time to know, or take action, but the time to listen, to see, to witness the deepest truths, which rest slow and dormant. A twinkle of potential in waiting. Within this unknown I sit, in the dark, to witness my frustration, fear and beliefs. I pay homage to the gifts of challenge and tenderly cradle the story of the difficulty of surviving in a time of separation and destruction. Longing for that clarity of non-duality, my mind yearns to figure out that which seemingly exists outside of myself so that I may illuminate my true purpose…which, of course my mind thinks is something other than Being. My ego would feel so much better inflated if I just trusted the illusion that I have it all figured out and under control!

Alas, the season of generosity brings me the gift of vulnerability. The acceptance of my illusion of separateness. The gratitude for this wise teacher guiding me home to the truth of the dark, as well as the pull of the other end of the spectrum, where summer illuminates clarity and swells ripe with ease of being. Even more than last year I do not cower away from this dark Dreamtime where my fear story dwells, but rather dive deep into the blackest waters of the unknown, surrendering to the effortlessness of floating like in a womb.  I remember that I can breathe fluid, maybe even better than the whispy air of consciousness. In this dream I breathe the interconnectedness of all, my divine birthright, the Tao. Unable and unwilling to separate myself, I embrace the wholeness being, transcending into a memory of the vibration beyond polarities, beyond the story of my life, beyond the mental, emotional, and physical acts of survival. I rest in the essence which has no proper name in human tongue and no need for one..

I float

buoyant in it’s grace

levied by viscosity

made everything by it’s nothingness


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The Secret of Life

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Butter

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suspended sunlight-ADK-perfect food

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Parsnipitty-Granny Mash

4 med parsnips, peeled and sliced into 1/4 inch rounds

3 granny smith apples, peeled, cored and sliced

lots of good pasture or Irish butter (you know, the kind that is yellow from cows who eat fresh green grass and have vitamin rich milk!)

pinch of celtic sea salt

In a large heavy skillet, melt at least 3 TBSP butter and gently brown, (stirring occasionally) the parsnips till coated and golden, 10 min tops

sprinkle apple slices on top, carefully pour 3/4 cup water on top and cover, steam for 8 min or until soft

scoop into high powered blender or food processor, adding another 1-3 TBSP butter and blend until smooth with a sprinkle of salt

serve hot with another pat of butter


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Seven Attitudes of Mindfulness

from Natalie Goldberg’s latest book, The True Secret of Writing, pg. 84

“mindfulness means to be aware, awake. To be alive, attentive, receiving as we move through our day. Not brittle, blind, disjointed, out-of-touch, stressed, nervous, excited-or at least aware of these states and even having a bit of compassion for ourselves. This list is a reminder of another way to be in the world- really a relief, a way out of our distress.

1. Non judging

2. Patience

3. Beginner’s Mind

4. Trust

5. Non striving

6. Accepting

7.Letting Go

These seven attributes are the state of mind advantageous for writing, sitting, walking. Also for approaching your employees, your boss, friend, lover, enemy. A way to carry yourself. And we can so easily forget. Put this list on your refrigerator.”

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